Morning Pages 4.21.16

As a future English teacher, teaching literacy and reading is somewhat of a give in, but that is why I feel like it needs to be talked about even more. Many topics that are "give-ins" are sometimes overlooked, or assumed to be taught when in fact they really are not. This is simply due to the fact that many think, "oh, you're teaching reading, therefore you must be teaching literacy", which is simply not the case. Yes, they are very similar, but they also need to be taught in different ways. Giving the students the gift of literacy is giving them the gift of understanding, critical thinking, and so much more. Yes, they need to learn to read, but they will be better readers if you focus more on the literacy aspect -- the rest will follow closely behind. 

Marginalization of Different Student Groups

Sadly, there are many different groups of students that subject to marginalization - whether it be based on their race, financial background. family situation, ect. But one group that I am passionate about is the disabled student population. A few months ago, I read the book Out of My Mind by Sharon Draper, and it was so very eye-opening. It is an easy read, but speaks volumes of what so many disabled students endure in the school system these days. On a side-note, I highly recommend every future educator to read this (it's only $5 on Amazon, what's there to say no to?) Anyhow, the book is narrated by a little girl named Melody, who has a disability that renders her unable to speak. Through reading this book, I found that so many disabled students are treated like they are dumb, or little children when in fact they are in junior high or high school - and yes, their disabilities make it more difficult for them to learn, but it also means that they are simply able to learn in different ways.

Many programs for disabled students barely have any room for the students to expand their learning by excelling through higher grades or levels - their classes simply stay the same throughout their experience. Some schools are getting better at this, but I just think that many teachers think its easy to run a classroom of disabled students because they don't need to be taught complex ideas. The thing is, they may not need complex ideas yet, but at the very least they need enough new material to stimulate growth. They may grow at a slower pace than others, but they still deserve to be given the best chance to try.  

Becoming an English Teacher Ally

There are truly so many students out there that are struggling with literacy because they are also learning a second language, like I mentioned in a previous blog post, but personally I think there are also many young students who are simply just struggling with reading and literacy. Many English speaking students are also slow readers, but sometimes they can be overlooked or overshadowed by so many ELL learners. I think literacy for all students needs to be taught consistently and thoroughly.

 On the International Literacy Association webpage, their main statement is -  
"The ability to READ, WRITE, and COMMUNICATE connects people and empowers them to achieve things they never thought possible. It truly is the basis of who we are and how we interact with the world." 

It is so true! Literacy is the basis of all learning, and it should be a priority to help every student excel in it. As a future English teacher, my goal is to make it a priority in my classroom, even above content. How are students supposed to understand content if they cannot succeed in their literacy skills? I've found during my time in Lesher Middle School that there are plenty of tools out there to help promote literacy while also teaching content. One example I have seen in the classroom I've been placed in is a kind of chapter book that also includes definitions/connotations of more difficult words. It is simple and easy to read, no need to look up the definitions in the back of the book - they are right there on the bottom of each page. The more difficult words are in bold print, and the explanation of them is printed directly below. This way, while students read out loud in class, you can have one student be responsible for always reading and defining the bold words. Then the students are hearing the definitions as well as having to stay on task because of the popcorn reading (and defining) method. 

      

Meeting with Antero

My meeting with Antero is this coming Thursday, but I already know it is going to be a fabulous learning experience & conversation, so stay tuned for all the details coming soon!

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Update! Just had my meeting with Antero today, and it was so eye opening to the simplest of things that people just frequently forget. We talked about ELL learners, and how to make them feel more comfortable in the classroom. How to make them feel respected, how to choose the right words to teach in, how to create a learning environment that encourages them, ect. 

Making ELL students know that their culture is respected is a huge priority for me. Me being from a totally different culture than them, I never want them to feel like I'm talking down in any way, shape, or form. Antero said that bringing it back to the basics, not pushing specific vocabulary, creating an environment where they can share their cultures with one another is the ideal way to do that. One specific line that Antero said that stood out to me was, "If you decorate your classroom only with things that inspire you, you will be putting your students in a cage". That idea really struck me -- I never thought about how visual motivation could be done "wrong". What helps and inspires me or others close to me may not be anything near what inspires my students, especially ELLs. Pictures speak a thousand words, and visual aids within the learning environment are so important to ELL students. Creating a learning environment that helps them start to understand and take in American language as well as support the sharing of their own is imperative. A few tips Antero passed on about allowing students to share their own cultural preferences were to have the students pick the music of the day -- allowing this will let them share a part of themselves with the class. 

Overall, the meeting with Antero was so nice and informative, he is so full of wisdom and love for teaching. :) 

Eagle Rock: a Non-Traditional Education Setting

Eagle Rock School and Professional Development Center is located here in northern Colorado, and is a non-traditional high school setting for students who need a different alternative to "normal" education. Their mission statement says it all:

"Implement effective and engaging practices that foster each student’s unique potential and help young people use their minds well at Eagle Rock School and to support schools nationally to do the same.  Eagle Rock serves adolescents who are not thriving in their current situations, for whom few positive options exist, and who are interested in taking control of their lives and learning."

They stand for the importance of supporting fully engaged education. Such an inspiring place!

I personally think that this program sounds extremely effective, caring, and helpful. Everyone learns differently, and simply because a student doesn't succeed in the traditional high school setting doesn't mean they cannot or will not succeed. 

The educational setting that Eagle Rock provides is a place that will consistently keep up with each individual student's needs. Learning in this setting will spark each student's interest, and (hopefully) re-ignite their desire to learn if they have previously lost it due to their experience in the standard school system. I think it will help students find subjects they are truly passionate about, and encourage them to continue with them.   

Becoming an Ally for ELL Students

ELL learners have a special place in my heart because I have personally worked with so many during my time this semester at Lesher Middle School. Recently, we watched a powerful video on how they frequently can only understand a few sporadic words per sentence. They are just as smart as any other student - they just simply cannot understand the language they are being taught in. How are they ever supposed to improve if we as teachers do not take them under our wing? The following is a combination of my sources I have found, and my top takeaways after reading them.

While researching different ways to support ELL learners, I came across quite a few helpful sources. This first one was nice and organized in a list, with creative ideas. 

All twelve of these tips are super helpful, and able to be integrated into many different aspects of the classroom. I think that is the most important part - integrating ELL learning into all different corners of the classroom, to ensure you aren't letting any certain subject take precedent over another. 

I also found a testimony from a local teacher in Denver, who works mainly with ELL students.  

What I found most interesting about her technique was the steady use of activating prior knowledge. Prior knowledge is so very important, especially for ELL students. If you can give them some common ground to grab onto while trying to learn this new language, it will make their understanding so much easier. She also uses scaffolding, which goes along with activating prior knowledge, it basically means building upon that bank of prior knowledge. By using scaffolding, you are ensuring that no gaps between understanding are created. Being a thoughtful ally to all ELL students that are learning not only a brand new language but a new way of learning is our responsibility as true educators.  

Morning Pages 4.14.16

I think the Privledge Walk is a very eye opening exercise and experience, but as for using it in the classroom I think it would depend on the different demographics of students in my room.  For example, I think the age factor would come into play for me as a teacher, because although it is a great eye-opening concept, it can only be fully understood with certain kinds of thinking. It is a heavy concept, and I would hate to spring it on a class full of students who weren't mentally ready. It may create less conflict between students, or it may create more - I think it is a powerful tool that needs to be used carefully and thoughtfully. If a class is too young, I feel like this exercise may make the more privileged students who end up in the front feel guilty, or bad - which is not the intent. The intent is simply perspective, but as an educator, we need to make sure that our students fully understand that before tackling this exercise. 

Morning Pages 4.12.16

Filling the role of "teacher as a reader" is something that I feel is frequently overlooked (quite unintentionally) by many.  We assume that since students are reading textbooks, that they are being encouraged to read, but in my opinion that is so far from the case. Many students read textbooks simply because they are required to, not because they enjoy it or even want to learn more.  Plus, there is also a huge difference in content, writing style, and basically everything between a textbook and a novel. There are infinite numbers of books in our world, each a different contemplation of the same 26 letters - it is truly amazing. Students should be encouraged by words, reminders, and examples that there is far more to reading than just their school textbooks. Teachers should make it a priority to explain to students about the different genres of text, how they can find one that fits their style, ect. Getting students excited about reading is all about getting them involved in a book about something that interests them rather than bores them. Give them the oppourtunity to pick their own cirriculum by letting them choose any topic at all for their free reading - you will see, that they will all pick specific topics that are unique to their own interests. They will be motivated and excited to read, which will instill in them a love of books that will last their lifetime. 

Morning Pages 4.7.16

Recently I have been teaching quite a few mini lessons in the classroom I've been placed in at Lesher Middle School, and have not only learned a lot from the students, but also from the process of planning and executing a lesson. The first time I taught a full class, I realized that I hadn't planned on certain amounts of down-time. For example, that 5 seconds while you're writing on the board? Yeah, you can loose students' attention within the first 3. Luckily, the class I was teaching was very respectful, quiet, and attentive - but I can only imagine what would have happened in a more rowdy group. Without actually experiencing what it feels like to get up and teach, the realization that you are going to have to plan through those few seconds of down-time and count them as important may slip by unnoticed. Personal expereinces in the classroom are beyond valuable. 

Impacted Student Interviews

For this section, I interviewed my boyfriend Aj, my best friend Danielle, and my co-worker Kyle. I asked the same questions in each interview, and took down a few notes.

While interviewing Kyle, he told me all about his high school teacher named Mr. Sheers. As he talked about him, I could tell that he was different than the rest because Kyle had told me previously that he really did not enjoy school as a kid. One statement that he said during our conversation was that he thinks Mr. Sheers made such an impact on him because he "tried to relate to us more than he tried to get us to relate", which I thought was fascinating. This is the core of what it means to be an ally for your students - becoming their confidant & friend prior to trying to teach content is very important. For Kyle, he knew that Mr. Sheers would always make a point of getting to chat with him about things he enjoyed rather than just content or homework. Especially for students who already dislike school and many of their teachers, this is important.

My second interviewee, Aj, explained to me that he loved his high school Spanish teacher (Miss Stivers) because she was patient with her students and got to know most of them on a more personal level. Aj said that she would always take a few minutes to ask the students about their weekends, what was bothering/exciting them today, ect. which made her more appealing to students like Aj. Simply knowing that the teacher cares about the things you like and enjoy, creates a better relationship. Caring about your students is also crucial to becoming a teacher as an ally.

While interviewing Danielle, she told me about her first grade teacher, Miss Moss. She explained that Miss Moss made quite an impact on her at such a young age because she was a fun teacher who still had rules for her classroom. Danielle said, "she was respectful and creative, and helped us think outside our own boxes". Later on in our interview, Danielle also confided in me that she used to get bullied quite a bit during her first grade year, and Miss Moss would allow her to help her out in the classroom during lunch so that she wouldn't have to go out with all the other students. This is also an important part of becoming a teacher as an ally - knowing when a student needs a safe place to rest. Even though her experience with Miss Moss was at such a young age, Danielle still remembers it vividly because it meant so much to her at the time, to simply have a safe place to go during lunch.

I think all three of these amazing teachers were great allies to their students, or at least to these three students I interviewed. They were supportive, encouraging, personal, kind, and caring. Each one wanted to better the environment that their students were learning in, and create a safe spot of every kind of child. Let's all aspire to be teachers like this!

   

Letter to an Ally Teacher. . .

Dear Ms. Zale,

You have impacted my life more than you know, ever since I walked into your first period photography class in 7th grade. Thank you for noticing that I was quiet, and different than the other kids. Every time you came over to my desk and whispered encouraging comments about my work, you inspired me to keep going. Thank you for always asking me about the place I missed more than anything - Oregon. Moving states right before you start 7th grade is hard! You made (at least that one class) so much more bearable.

As I transitioned into high school, I'm so glad I got to have you for a few more art classes! Your sarcastic humor with the class but friendly chat with me, made me feel so special - like I was your favorite, although technically I knew you weren't allowed to have any. And since you used to live in Oregon too, I felt like we always had something special & unique for just us to talk about.

When I was a senior & I took A.P. Art with you during the last period of every day, I was always so happy to get to your classroom and relax! Especially that year, I felt like we were friends more than teacher and student, because our class was so small we had so much time to talk. You were always 100% honest with me about how life as a teacher would be if I decided to continue to pursue this career choice, and for that I thank you as well. On a more funny note, that time you told me the story behind the star tattoo you have on your foot made me feel like you truly did enjoy spending time with me.

Thank you for always making me feel special, and know that just because I was quiet didn't mean I wasn't worth something. You always encouraged me to be real, never let anyone tell me what to do, and work hard at the things I truly cared about. Thank you for setting a true example for me of what a teacher as an ally looks like.

Because of this example, I know exactly how I want to treat my own students someday - with respect and honesty. I always want to see the worth in the quiet student sitting in the back row, and never overlook anyone's potential.

love always,

Lauren    

50 Great Teachers

As I was reading through NPR's articles titled "50 Great Teachers", I came across a few that stood out to me as extra special. The following teachers are fantastic examples of how much of an ally we should truly be for our students - 

I read through the article about the SXSW Education Conference first, and realized that so many lives are touched by teaching. Even though we might not see it in the moment, we are constantly effecting unique minds and lives. The people who attended this conference all were asked to write a note to a past teacher who helped them in some way, and so many of them were inspiring, for example - 

"Mr. Bua only taught Malamed one elective at his suburban New York middle school, but that didn't matter. "He was someone who was there to support me and my interests outside of the classroom," Malamed says. "He inspired me to be much more than just a student." Malamed remembers Bua staying after school and spending time working on a big social awareness project. "He helped me begin to find relevance and purpose in my learning experience.'" 

This teacher, Mr. Bua, was an ally for his students because he supported them as human beings and gave them importance, which is what a true ally should aspire to do. Being an ally means supporting and cheering on your students, in & out of the classroom. 

The second source I read dealt with college professors, but I was still interested in it even though I am studying to be a secondary educator - I thought it would be interesting to see the similarities and differences. In this article, I found an important similarity between the two - preparing your lessons with the outcome in mind. In my E340 class, I am currently learning about lesson planning, and how important it truly is to keep the end goal in mind. After reading this article, I realized that it is true for all subjects and levels. 

"They prepare by thinking about the intended outcomes [of their instruction]. They treat their lectures and discussions as serious intellectual endeavors." 

By preparing your lessons with the end in mind, and treating everyday like an important day, you are consciously making the most of your students' time, which also conveys respect. Being an ally is all about respect and being on the same page as your students - planning your lessons ahead with the end in mind helps keep the end goal in the forefront of everyone's brain. 

Lastly, I took a look at this article. This woman inspired me so much, even though she is a math teacher and I am pursuing English. She clearly is not in the teaching profession for the money, or for the days off, but for the kids. She lives and works in a small, poor town in Oklahoma. Her classroom is far from updated, but she makes it colorful, imaginative, and lively. She gets paid less than all the schools around her, but she still stays because she believes that "these kids deserve better". Being an ally includes giving. You must be selfless with the time you spend with your students, teaching them by example what is truly important in this world. 

Overall, the teachers mentioned on this website were amazing, inspirational, and hard working. Each one thought outside the conventional box, which lead to greater student involvement and success. We can all learn so much from simply hearing what these other teachers have to say and tell about their experiences as an ally and cheerleader for their students. 

Morning Pages 4.5.16

Personally I have never had any expereince with bullying, but I have known kids who have. It tears them apart, makes them feel like their ideas are insignificant, and lowers their self esteem immensely. Just recently for one of my other classes, I interviewed a 6th grade student at Lesher Middle School here in Fort Collins. One of my questions was, "is there anything you dislike about this school? what is it and why?" Sadly, his answer was bullying. He explained to me that he rarely gets bullied himself anymore, but that he witnesses it happening to so many others and it makes him uncomfortable. Keep in mind, this student explained to me earlier in the interview that he wants to join the military someday so that he can "protect all the women and little kids in America" - he has a huge heart. Bullying doesn't just effect those who are direct victims, it effects the entire morale and feel of the student body. Lesher has the best moral and student enthusiasm I've seen, they hold themselves to a very uplifting and positive vibe. But even then, bullying still sneaks in. Answering the question, "how do we stop bullying?" is a tricky one. All I know is that we need to continue addressing it in each individual situation, support/encourage students to rally against it, and hope for the best. 

Morning Pages 3.31.16

Technology in classrooms is truly a "hot button" topic. Personally, I think it will always be, simply because technology usage in schools should always be evaluated on a situation-to-situation basis. Many factors need to be considered while trying to decide if certain parts of technology are best fit for different groups of students. I have observed classrooms where students are distracted, withdrawn, submerged because of the technology they have at their fingertips - but I have also watched classrooms where students thrive while self motivating themselves through working with technology. Basically, to sum it up, I truly believe the issue of technology in classrooms needs to continuously be a unique decision based on the unique learning styles of students. Technology can be a helper if guided and instructed to be used correctly, but it can be a huge hinderance if not controlled. 

Morning Pages 3.29.16

We wait for the next vacation, the next paycheck, the next good meal. We don't live near our families, so we wait to see them once or maybe twice a year. We have these dreams we wait on - to write the next great American novel, to start our own business, to become a yoga instructor, to learn to cook, to live in the beautiful place we've always wanted. But do we go out and pursue them? No; because we are a society who is constantly being told we are thriving when we are simply just surviving on impalpable, fleeting dreams. We work day in and day out at a job we hate, to pay for the expensive house we love but never get to enjoy living in. As we work we imagine, hope, and wait for the day when things will be different. But the catch is - things will never be different. By living on dreams, we are forgoing sustanence. We are deceiving ourselves. Our dreams and wishes will never happen unless we conciously quit the cycle. Stop waiting for the important things in life to get dropped on your doorstep, tied with a bow. Stop living 800 miles away from your family. Stop pushing back that calligraphy class you want to take because the lie "you don't have time" keeps overwhelming you. Stop living only for those few days of vacation you get a year. Stop telling yourself you can't write that book until later. You CAN do it right now. Stop allowing life to control you - go out and control your life. 

I'm done waiting; I'm going home. I'm going to convert these dreams I've been waiting on into reality; put an end to this game we all play. I am going to be happy now, pursue my ideas now, be healthy now. And I absolutely can't wait to experience a life absent of waiting.

UGP Reflection

While looking back on the time I spent working on my Unfamiliar Genre Project, I can see how far I have come. We as a class have come far! I think that while you're in the moment working on the little tasks that make up this Teacher as a Writer badge, you tend to get lost in the stress of finishing little details without remembering the bigger goal. For me, I know that was the case. Looking back now though, I am extremely happy with my genre I chose, and how I finally achieved my goal and got there.

My genre was short story, and little did I know that I would run into so many small (but confidence shaking) wobbles along the way. I found that once I finished all the pre-writing prep, that it was difficult for me to sit down and simply write it.  I was worried, and a little intimidated, and I kept putting it off. I wobbled with the should-be-simple task of how to begin. For some reason, sitting down and starting this project was most daunting. I think I was slightly intimidated by the genre I picked, seeing as I had never been successful at it in the past. One day, I decided that I needed to tackle it, and so I did. I went to my favorite coffee shop, sat down in a nice quiet (but not too quiet) corner, and wrote. Something that really surprised me was that my entire short story came out in one sitting! I guess the part that was stressing me out was the fact that all my ideas were swimming around in my head, and once I put them down on paper everything felt more organized. I enjoyed writing it, even though it was difficult at some points.

I wanted this short story to be able to be read by teachers and young students alike, so I strived to make it simple and shorter. I assumed that would be easier to do than trying to make it more complicated and lengthy, but I was wrong. After I got in the groove with my writing, I didn't want to stop. I also struggled with my vocabulary that I was using, because I tend to want to use bigger words, but when writing a short story for younger students, usually the big words need to be left at home. To include a full story inside a confined amount of three pages was hard because I then had to figure out a way to develop characters, conflict/resolutions, ect. all in three pages as well. Fitting a whole plot was hard to do, which surprised me. I had to keep my goal in mind the whole time - creating a short story that can not only be read by adults, but young students too.

Because it ended up being such a simple story, I wasn't sure how I felt about it at first. When I read it over, I thought that it was far too simplistic, short, and easy. I thought it was decent, but no piece of art! After re-assessing and talking with my writing group about it, I came to the conclusion that it was completely fine to be all of those things, because they fit my purpose. I think we as a society put pressure on writing and writers to be "stunning, amazing, wonderful, perfect!", when in reality, a good writer simply needs to fulfill the purpose, goal, and task they have at hand.

I also wobbled with writing dialogue between my characters. I really didn't need much, but still it was necessary to include some. It was difficult because I have never been taught how before, nor have I ever attempted it. I knew that it was going to be difficult for me, but it was more than I expected. After my first attempt at creating dialogue, I had to delete what I had written, take a break, and start again. It was extremely frustrating in the moment, and honestly I am still not %100 percent thrilled with how it came out. At first, every line sounded far too scripted and cheesey; then it started to get slightly easier. The positive that came out of the dialogue experience is that now I know something I need to work on and learn more about. I want to grow in my writing abilities, and dialogue is an important aspect of that.

Overall, this project challenged me not only while writing in my genre, but it also challenged me to form and solidify certain opinions I have on the world of education. In my short story, I got the opportunity to get into the mind of a sixth grader. After spending so much time trying to develop my character, I began to sympathize with her. Participating in this project helped me to create an even stronger opinion and belief to back up my pre-existing touchstones on education that I am passionate about.    

Morning Pages 3.3.16

Ideally, I am not too picky when it comes to who reads what I write. In fact, I'm working on trying not to mind as much, and just open my ideas & words up to anyone who wants to read them. But in a perfect world, I would consistently choose my sister and my boyfriend as the first two people to read something I create. I choose them because my sister has a mind very similar to mine, and she always understands what I am trying to say. She appreciates my ideas, and enjoys reading things I write. I also like having my boyfriend read my words, because he comes from a different perspective. He is (obviously) a boy, and his brain is more inclined to science and math rather than language and literature. When he reads what I create, he responds with a new perspective that I would have never thought of on my own, which helps me to grow and open my own mind up wider the next time I write, and so on. I enjoy being the reader for others, because I just love hearing everyone's unique ideas. I think it is amazing that we humans have 26 letters in our alphabet, and depending on how we arrange them we can create such different and personal works of art. I even enjoy simply editing papers for grammatical and formatting errors, simply because I enjoy organization and am somewhat of a perfectionist. Many of my friends frequently ask me to edit their papers and read them over before they turn them in, and I don't mind helping out with that at all. By having two different perspectives on my own work, it helps me to expand and work on my own ideas.    

Morning Pages 3.1.16

Why Write What is Unfamiliar? 

Last morning pages centered around "why I write", and this time I want to focus on why I desire to write what is unfamiliar alongside my tried & true favorites. Of course writing in my journal is comfortable; I think it is as comfortable as I get while writing. Most likely because I don't have to filter what I want to say, I simply lay down all my thoughts on the page. Writing on my blog is a little less comfortable because all of a sudden I have an audience and a filter is needed. 

It may be tempting to simply stick to the genre or aspect of writing that you know, love, and feel comfortable in, but how are you going to grow? Learning is a curve, not a straight line; you cannot stay stoic and continue to learn to your greatest extent. We need to push ourselves to become greater, expand our horizons & clean up our talents. We need to realize what we struggle with and meet it head on, with full intentions to conquer it to the best of our abilities. 

As future teachers, we cannot loose our own desire to learn simply because we ourselves are not in school anymore. We need to be open to learning about things that interest us, as well as learning from our students. An open mind is key, and teaching that way will also allow your students to see that learning truly is a life-long process. They will see that learning should be a part of everyday life, if their teacher sets that personal example. 

I Think It's Important To E X P L O R E . . .

Really, I do. We have this whole world at our finger tips -- so many different cultures, cities, rolling hills, road-side diners. When I was a little girl, I told my mother that I wanted to live each year in a different place, simply so I could expereince the feeling of what it means to be a true part of said-place, & not just be a tourist. Now is the time for me to do just that. 

There are so many things I want to say; so many things I want to write about. The running list I keep is a compilation of singular moments, that will someday hopefully all come together to create something beautiful -- 

The time I was at a half-star motel in Arizona & saw a girl in an old high school sweatshirt sitting on the steps smoking a lonely cigarette. 

The feeling that goes along with sitting alone on your porch at night; listening to old "annnd here's Frank Sinatra!" tracks while eating Chinese out of cute little boxes as the breeze takes control of the world around you and sends a single soda can clicking down the empty street, momentarily interrupting poor Frank & the boys. 

When you take on a solo road trip, and that indescribable feeling of freedom hits you every time you realize the power & independence you hold in your hands as you grasp that wheel. 

When you cross a state line for the very first time, perfect song escaping on full volume out your open windows, and you know in your heart you will never be able to experience that "first" again. 

That one night you sat there under your hometown stars with the three people that mean the most to you in the world, playing cards by candle light & pretending like your universe wasn't about to be turned upside down in a few days by the deceptive force that commonly goes by the name of "college". 

Exploring is more than landmarks and theme parks. It's all of those feelings, expereinces, moments & more; and it's the people you expereince them with. So go drink a beer in Nashville; slide up onto a New York barstool & order a Manhattan like it's nobody's business; pop open a bottle of sparkling champagne in Paris. And you know those beautiful human beings who love you because you're you? Who you can't imagine living without? Pack them in your suitcase and bring them along. 

Someday, I will write a book. Someday, you'll be walking through Barnes & Noble and see my name there, on the "Up & Coming Fiction" table, between Maupin and Moyes. And your eyes will do a double-take. You'll pick it up, and some line like "I went to high school with this girl" or "Wow, when I knew her she was so quiet, is this really hers?" will run through your mind. And I hope you'll want to read it. 

It will be filled with moments like the ones above, and many more that I have not expereinced yet. So I suppose I'm just as in the dark as you are, friend-that-just-picked-up-my-future-novel. Who knows what's filling those pages; I sure don't, at least not yet. But I can assure you they will be living, breathing words that I hold dear to my heart -- and I hope you will be able to get some life out of them too. I hope they will encourage you to go out and start your own mod-podge of moments. You can't go looking for them, you simply have to go out and wait for them to find you. They will, I promise - and when they do, you'll be ready. You'll know when they arrive because a familiar yet completely unique sensation will come over you, and you'll know you absolutely, without a doubt, need to write this down.

That's why I want to try and tackle fiction for my Unfamilar Genre Project. I want to jump right into it, and write about things that effect me and stick with me as important. This also applies to my so-far expereinces I've had in the teaching program. Those moments where you are encouraged and affirmed that you are perusing the right career; when you know that this is your passion. When that student calls you over after you just taught your first solo lesson on apostrophes and says, "Miss McCrillis! I just found the perfect way to remember the differences between its and it's!" There are still some students out there that are excited about learning, and our job as future teachers are to encourage them as well as other students who don't exactly love learning (yet). There will be some hard days, but there will also be moments after moments like the one mentioned above; and those are the moments I want to teach for. I want students to learn to love writing and realize their own purpose behind the pen; and to know that they can change the world's perspective by sharing their own. 

My goal for this class is to start working on the rough outline of my Unfamilar Genre Project within the next few weeks, and the start writing the rough draft. I want to get my ideas out on the page, and then go back and edit, edit, edit. I want it to be an evolving work that is constantly changing and getting better. With my writing group helping me out, I don't see how this will not work. This will be a writing success story for me, and I know that at the end of the semester I will feel extremely accomplished. Hopefully someday I'll look back and still feel motivated from the work I have done this semester, and be thankful for it as well. I want it to be a stepping stone towards future writing I will do, like my own book someday. I think learning to collaborate with my writing group is a huge step in the growing process for me -- learning to open up and accept criticism as well as praise is something I need to work on. Learning this skill will prepare me and help me to become a stronger and more confident writer. 

Morning Pages 2.25.16

Why I Write. . . 

Personally, I don't think we ask ourselves this question enough. It should always be at the forefront of our minds, because our writing should always have a purpose. For me, my purpose is always changing depending on what I am writing. While writing in my personal journal I write for pleasure, for making sense of my feelings, for the sake of recoding fleeting moments in time that I'll never get back. I believe in all of that -- most importantly, that those moments when you look around and realize you will never be as happy as you are right in that second ever again, need to be recorded. When I write for a class such as this one, I write to improve my skills. I write with the sole purpose of growing in my abilities so that I can continue to write better and better in the future. I think writing is a task that requires maturing over time, because it should always be evolving as your learn more. While writing my personal blog, I write for the sake of telling my own story, sharing things I hold dear, and branching out in my confidence. My personal blog is a place for me to share my writing as well as my life with others, and it helps me to grow in my own confidence. 

Writing carries a different meaning for each and every one of us, it is a deeply personal expereince. Writing captures a tiny moment in time, and fleshes it out into half a chapter of the next best-selling novel; it re-creates emotions and feelings that come with certain places so that others can experience them as well. Writing takes me to Paris, a farm in Kansas, a country music bar in Tennessee. Writing expands our world, takes us to places we long to be, and reminds us of the places we have been. 

Morning Pages 2.23.16

A Letter to the Next President . . . 

    As a teacher in the United States I think that during your term you need to use your power for good in the education system. This country needs to realize that it is important and ever-changing. 

And I guess for now I don't have anything else to say, because I've been staring at this page for the entire morning pages time and I couldn't come up with a single thing, I'm so sorry. 

My Unfamiliar Genre Project - Beginnings

The nature of the Unfamilar Genre Project is to try out and expereince a genre that you've never been a part of before, or even never successfully conquered. Facing those genres that make you nervous is a great idea to help you improve and grow as a writer -- because fear has no place in the life of a writer. Creativity, perseverance, an open mind? Yes. Fear that it "won't be good enough" or nervousness that you "won't be able to do it"? No. 

For my Unfamilar Genre Project, I want to try an tackle a style of writing that I have struggled with in the past: fiction/short stories. In the past, when I have tried to sit down and write my own short story, my thought process would come to a screeching halt because I would realize that I was unintentionally & subconsciously mimicking stories I had read in the past. Whether it be a slight representation with small similarities to some of my favorite novels or a combination of a few, I would get frustrated that my mind "couldn't come up with anything fully & purely unique" and I would stop. 

I have decided that it is time to conquer this relationship I have with fiction built out of frustration and fear. It's been a long time knowing ya, but I think it's time to cut ties -- I have bigger and better things to move on to, like fearless fiction. 

My Unfamiliar Genre Project will be unique, it will be pure, and it will be my own. I want to write a fiction story about either of the following. . . A) the life & times of a sixth grade classroom from the perspective of a fairly new teacher  -or-  B) the perspective of a sixth grade student dealing with and trying to conquer middle school for the first time.  I think either of these ideas will help me with my creative process, and will help me develop more experience writing fiction.  

I have massive amount of motivation to improve my fiction writing skills, I have always wanted to be able to write my own book someday -- I just never thought it could become reality until now. Starting with this project, and taking baby steps towards my goal will help me become successful and tackle this fear. 

I'm ready for you, unfamiliar genre. Let's do this!

The Power of "Not Yet"

In response to Carol Dweck's TED talk -- 

I was moved by her words and her passion she so clearly felt behind them. As teachers, and quite frankly as decent human beings, we need to realize the power of our words and how we say them. Tone, context, and many other factors can change how you effect others without even realizing it. Simple positive changes, for example, could be using the phrase "keep practicing, next time you'll get it right" rather than "that's not right, please try again".  Combining positive reinforcement with gentle suggestions on how to improve will create a vibe in the classroom that makes students feel like they are constantly improving; constantly moving forward; never stagnate.  No one wants a stagnate classroom -- we want active thinkers and positive doers. The minute a student feels like they truly cannot do a math problem or rewrite a sentence so it isn't a fragment is the minute they completely check out. If they do not feel like they have the potential, why would they want to keep trying if they are lead to believe they will continue failing? Keeping in mind the other students in class is also something we as teachers should realize has a huge effect on specific students. How do you think they feel if you are constantly praising other students' work, while telling them they're wrong? Casting a positive, encouraging glow over all of your comments as a teacher will create a better classroom environment. To put it simply, students need to know from the get-go that you will always believe in their potential to understand and learn ANYTHING. They are too young to have that personal "I'm going to force myself to succeed no matter what" mindset; nor is it time for them to think like that yet. They need encouragement and they fully deserve it. As they move on and grow through their lives, hopefully that positive mindset of "not yet" will catch on. Years will fly by, and without them even realizing where it came from, they will be thinking thoughts like "I don't understand college level molecular biology yet, but I will" and "I'm not ready for that full time leadership position at work yet, but I will be". This mindset can start now. We can teach content while teaching life skills and perseverance. Taking the time to polish your words and create a positive classroom vibe where anything is possible is worth it. Instilling this motivation in students may be even more important than them remembering every single word on their vocab list, because it is a mindset that will set them up for success for years to come. We as teachers cannot simply preach this idea, but we must practice it ourselves too. Students learn from example. They need to see that their teacher is fearlessly approaching the tasks life hands her with a growing, positive glow of "not yet". Giving the power of "not yet" creates fearless, motivated learners.

On My First Day as a Real-Life Teacher

Dear Future-Teacher-Me,

    Today you woke up and realized something: you're a ''real'' adult now. With a ''real'' job.
. . . And you're going to impact  R E A L  lives.

    The kids aren't always going to listen to you, they won't always get perfect grades, and they certainly will not always be simple. But it is going to be worth it -- because they will grow, and you'll grow along with them.

    It's scary, being the one in charge. You are going to have to be a leader and learn to stand up for what you want your classroom to look like. The way you impact your students on the first day is critical -- they need to know that even though you are soft-spoken (and almost as tall as many of them) that you still intend to be listened to.

    Classroom management and attitude is oh-so-important. My students need to know that I am on their side. They need to know the classroom is a safe place; a place where everyone (including me) shares one common goal: to improve & truly learn. I want to be on their side. I want to encourage them not only in their academics but in their social and mental skills.

    This is a big task to take on, but remember you have been trained for this! You have read all the books and observed all the schools - now it's your turn. Practice what you preach, woman. You've worked & studied & prayed for this. You can do it.

    You know it will be a learning process, and you need to always remember that, especially on your worst days. There will always be some days that are better than others; days where you wish you had a simple desk job instead of a crazy, stressful, frustrating, saddening, teaching position. But that's what you get when you work with precious little human souls, you get real life. You get it handed to you every day, tied with a little pink bow. Real life is all those things previously mentioned, but it is also rewarding, amazing, heartwarming, and full of innocence. It's a constantly changing tide, and you're going to have to learn to roll with the waves.

     But it will all be worth it, you'll see. Now go put on that pretty teacher dress you bought months ago while planning for this day. Feel confident. And smart. And able.

    Go out and  t e a c h.

 

A Letter To Myself As A Writer

Dear Lauren, 

              Someday you want to be able to teach groups and groups of precious young minds to write, and write well. Before doing that, you will need to work on improving your own skills and learning to grow in many different ways you never knew were possible. You should attempt writing outside your comfort zone more, because how will you ever be able to inspire and encourage your future students if you do not have faith in yourself? Writing is a scary thing because there is never one right answer, and not everyone will always agree with what you have to say - and even the youngest of students know that. They need a teacher who can say with no regrets that she has ventured into areas outside of her writing comfort zone; a teacher who can write a blog, a short story, an argumentative paper. A teacher who is currently working on a fiction book of her own, which scares/intimidates her to no end, but she still wants to pursue and conquer it. If you want to be not only a good educator, but also a motivator, you need to first advance yourself.  

My Touchstone Writing Moment - Under a Magnifying Glass

    Looking back over my three touchstone writing moments I wrote about last week, I realized that a one of them stood out the most. The way I used to hide all my diaries and journals when I was younger is most likely the way that the majority of children (and adults too) still feel today. I know I do, and I'm an English major - I should be able to get past this fear of sharing my work. It's not that my teachers while I was growing up put down my writing necessarily, I think it's the fact that many of them didn't encourage sharing it. As a future teacher, I see a need to instill confidence in students.
   
    I am currently assisting a 6th grade English teacher at Lesher Middle School for one of my courses here at CSU, and so far I have found the school to be very impressive. At Lesher, they believe that an effective learning environment is centered around positive moral and a mentally/physically healthy student body. Many teachers spend the first week of class simply getting to know their students and letting the students become acclimated to others around them. They spend more time talking with the students like they are equals, asking them what they think the classroom rules should be, and creating a positive vibe within their four little walls of a classroom. Personally, I think this mentality is a fantastic idea. Approaching education like it is a project to tackle and learn together, giving students the opportunity to be heard and express their feelings, creates a more positive environment to teach in for the rest of the year. Someday, I want my students to know I am on their side. I want them to be able to be honest with me and each other, because they will know I will always be honest with them. My classroom will be a place filled with confidence and teamwork, where students can throw themselves into their work without being scared of what others will think.

    I want to be able to use my past experiences/feelings for good, and learn from them when applying them to becoming a teacher. I want to be able to remember how it felt to write something in 7th grade and worry that it wasn't good enough. And again, remember how it was in 12th grade looking out towards my future, and worrying that people would laugh when I told them I was majoring in English. My desire is to help cultivate and encourage my students into becoming fearless learners.  

The World of Blogs

The three blogs I visited fall under the following genres: education, lifestyle, and interior decorating. All three of these genres are of interest to me, and I had a great time browsing through them.

I have been keeping up with Lauren Conrad's blog for quite some time now, and it's one of my favorites! She posts a perfect mixture of fashion, motivation, lifestyle, and fitness. Her intended/implied audience is women, most likely between the ages of 17 & 30, seeing as her content deals with a somewhat modern day lifestyle. The overall tone of all her posts is very motivating, which implies that the readers are desiring some sort of change in their lives. Her posts are written in assumption that the audience needs help with some aspect of their lives, whether it be fashion, cooking, DIY, decorating, ect. There are many writers who contribute to this blog who are all a part of the "Lauren Conrad Team", and a technique they use in many of their posts is a short personal narrative. For example, if they are explaining how to make DIY hand soap, they will start out by saying how fantastically it worked for them in their personal lives, and how everyone else should try it too. As with any other form of social media where people have control over how their lives and words are perceived, these writers do seem like they want to be thought of as hardworking, creative, beautiful, and even slightly "perfect". Everyone naturally writes about their own best attributes, and while there is nothing particularly wrong with that, there are also a few issues. When women who truly want to improve on the subjects written in Lauren Conrad's blog read these personal narratives of "perfect" women, it ironically ends up bringing them down rather than motivating them as it is supposed to. As long as the reader understands this to be the case, and reads through the lens that no one is truly perfect, then there is no issue with writing this tone.

While browsing education blogs, I came across this one called Edspresso. Naturally, I thought the  name was cute, but as I kept reading the content began to peak my interest as well. I found it was neat to read about breaking news going on in the education world, because I think it is important to be well informed, especially within your field of work. Seeing as this blog is somewhat of a portal to many other smaller, more local blogs, I think the intended audience is teachers everywhere. On their home page is a drop down menu with multiple different references to more specific blogs, which I think is a great tool to reach so many teachers. This blog is formatted like a news source, which is nice and pretty easy to navigate. I think the writers of this blog simply want their readers to view them as informed, and a reliable source.

Lastly, I found a blog centered around interior decorating, called Coco + Kelley. I am so passionate about decorating, and creating the perfect little space that this blog was one of my favorites I found so far. It contains cute DIY home projects, like this desk organizer  as well as "room of the week" inspiration pictures. The only thing that bothered me about this blog was the format; I think it could have been more organized and easier to navigate.  I think the writers of this blog are simply speaking to anyone with even a spark of a passion for decorating, and they want others to see them as creative, smart, and good at what they do. These days, there are so many different options when it comes to home decor (as seen here below), that anyone can take a gander at it and personalize it in a way that fits their lifestyle.      

Now that I have sufficiently gone over my word limit for this post, I will sum it up as briefly as possible: 

Blogs as a form of writing are unique in comparison to other genres because they are more casual, personalized, and unique. They can cover such a wide range of topics, yet still be classified as a "blog". Blogging gives everyone equal opportunity to show the world their thoughts. Through my own personal blog, I desire to write words that are motivational but not demeaning, thoughtful but succinct, and truthful without any doubt in my own confidence.  

Morning Pages 1.21.16

While watching the short YouTube video, an idea from the reading we did in "Why School?" came back to me.  Nobody ever asks students what they want to learn, how they learn, or why they want to learn.  Year in and year out, teachers use the same lesson plans, same lectures, same teaching styles for different groups of students, assuming that it will always be effective. Sure, students will always need a basic elementary education to build upon; full of the classic standards. But once they move on and up into high school, they should be able to have more of a say in what they want to learn and how they want to do it. This could be why so many generations of students have come to have the mindset that hating school is "cool".  If they are not interested in the topic or how it is being taught, they will never have that desire to study and follow it further. I don't think the problem is necessarily the topics being taught as much as it is the amount of freedom given to students.  By giving students the freedom to find their passion and pursue it in it's entirety, you would also be filling them with the motivation and true desire to continue learning not only in school, but also in life.   

Touchstone Writing Moments

    As I think back over my past experiences and encounters with writing during the twenty year course of my life, four important instances stand out in my mind as being true "touchstone moments". The following memories are dear to me, especially now, as I am able to look back and see the progress I have made.  

    When I was between the ages of 6 & 7, my grandma gave me what I deemed from that moment on the greatest birthday present in the universe: a create your own storybook kit.  It really was a box full of fun, especially to me.  It provided the resources to write and illustrate my own little book - even including an envelope to send away my work to be "published".  So that birthday, my grandma and I sat down to compose a children's novel of our own.  Granted at this age, my grandmother should really have gotten credit for the story line, the correct spelling, the punctuation, ect. . . . but as loving grandmothers do, she simply donated her ideas to my own creative process.  The end product? The beloved story of "Mitsy the Kitsy", which I'm sure you all know very, very well.  Or at least little girl me believed you would come to know and love quite dearly, since it was an actual hard copy book that I wrote on my very very own! (and even illustrated too). Double feature, my friends . . . 

    If you sorted through all my belongings, you still (hopefully) wouldn't be able to find those that I have held most dear since my mid-elementary school years - all my diaries.  And there's a reason for that: ever since I can remember I would write and record my thoughts in a little book that I would put large amounts of effort into hiding.  Looking back I have a much better understanding on why I struggle with people reading my words today, and it is because of how I acted when I was younger.  Hiding my words from the world became a habit, and to this day I still keep a secret diary hidden somewhere in my bedroom. 

    Nowadays, 20 year old me has been trying her best to keep up with writing a personal blog and sharing it with whoever wants to read it.  I want to be able to gain confidence in my own words, thoughts, and ideas - enough confidence to the point where I wouldn't mind if every stranger I met on the street read my blog.  On my blog, I try to write whatever comes to mind at the moment.  Or I will be out somewhere, and little details of the world around me will inspire such ideas that I feel compelled to write about them.  Sometimes I write about ''the life and times of Lauren McCrillis'', or simply about the way I felt when I visited the Grand Canyon for the first time. My goal is to become fully confident and unashamed of my words, because then I will truly be able to grow in my writing.